Playing Pharaoh

Tonight I played the part of Pharaoh, yes the mean old guy who kept telling Moses and the Israelites "No". This was the second night of VBS where our story looks at Moses all week. Last night we saw the burning bush, a project tht kept me up til 3:00am before....not that it helped as it didn't work quite as well at the church building. Today we looked at the Plagues, the first nine, we are hitting Passover tomorrow night. Last night when I asked the kids what they already knew about Moses and my youngest, Isaiah, shouted out "Crossover". I couldn't think of what he meant so when I asked him about it he loudly said, "You're the pastor, you should know!" Later I figured out he meant to say Passover.

This is the last week for our Children's Pastor, Jaimie Mercer, so I think she is totally unconcerned about what she does to me. Jaimie's husband is joining the staff of the Mississippi State University in the fall......by the way, we all now officially hate Mississippi, it does not matter it is the coolest word my children have learned to spell, we still hate them. Her last day with us is this Sunday and she, and her husband Andrew, will be missed more than any of us can imagine.

So, with no fear in her heart, Jaimie assigned me the part of Pharaoh. I was Pharaoh, I went through the first nine plagues suffering the abuse of the VBS kids. I was pelted with hail stones, attacked by gnats and flies, I had to smell the dead fish due to the river being changed to blood, I had locusts all over me as well as blisters and boils, all my livestock died, and I ended up in total darkness. With each group I met with it seemed that their aggressive plagues seem to get rougher, the younger the group's age, the more the plagues began to sting. It was a tough evening to be the man in power.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Great Parenting/Great Relating

Today we returned from a fantastic week at Student Life For Kids camp at Austin College in Sherman, Texas to a bubbling controversy on the fourth grade football front. Isaiah, and even Lily one year, has had the same two football coaches over the years that he has played since first grade. Coach David and Coach Matt have been wonderfully teaching and affirming coaches all these years. I really doubt that Isaiah would have any desire to play if it were not for these two men. They are both very passionate, Coach Dave was kicked out of one game this year for yelling at the refs. They jump up and down, scream, and still constantly encourage and teach the boys (and Lily). Every year we find out if they are coaching again before we choose to sign up for the next season.

The season that begins this fall is a bit of a transition year. The boys in the fourth grade have the opportunity to choose if they want to play one last year of flag or if they want to go ahead and begin tackle. Coach David had told us at the end of last season that he was leaving it up to his son as to which league he would be coaching this season (Coach Matt is David's brother-in-law and only has an infant son but has coached with David every year).

This week Coach David sent out his decision to coach one last season of flag football. This caused quite a stir and apparently many of the parents had complained this past year about the fourth graders still playing flag that had an unfair size and maturity advantage over the third graders. I guess this was quite the source of conversation in the parents' circles but, of course, Andrea and I were once again out of the loop (we prefer it that way) and were unaware. I do not know that this was an issue to the boys as Isaiah never mentioned it....I am sure that some of the boys took on their parent's complaints. When we got home today and checked our email we were surprised at the back and forth emails between the entire group of parents, most were upset at Coach David. Most of the parents that voiced a concern felt that this was going to make them be what they had complained about last year....fourth graders playing flag instead of tackle. Some also felt that the kids needed to be pushed into tackle now to better prepare them for the future.

As we read all the emails we were wondering what exactly would be David's response. We were hoping that he was not disheartened by this. Late in the day he finally responded in a way that I have never seen. The way he related to the other parents and the reflection on his parenting and family priorities was possibly the most amazing statement I have ever seen.

I requested his permission to share and use what he wrote and he said yes, so here it is:

I appreciate everyone's responses. My email was not to sway you to play flag if you intended to play tackle, but to let you know what I would be coaching. Everything you said is right and true. However, I feel if your child, (and/or mine) has even the slightest reservation about playing tackle, then they should not play. They have to be ready in their brain. You can not make them ready, you can not make them "man up" because once they get tackled or hit and I mean REALLY tackled, or hit, it is going to make it worse for them, not better. Every injury I have ever had, every stitch and broken bone has been from playing football. I have even suffered injuries from playing flag football as an adult Some of the boys are definitely ready to play tackle football and although it pains me that we will be splitting up the team, ultimately I am signing up to coach my son Carson. I have coached many of these boys since the 1st grade, and have loved every minute of it. Every time I have made the decision for Carson in sports, it has been the wrong choice, I am letting him decide what he is ready for. I will miss any of you that decide to move on to tackle and will respect your decision to do so. Hopefully we will reunite the team after this season. Thanks, David

I pray that I can think, relate, and respond with such skill and wisdom.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Thirteen

It is officially over and the vacation went out with a blustering hot and humid day. I got this phase of the yardwork completed and we took the kids for a snowcone. It was a good day. Tomorrow it is back to the office which I am truly up for.

Thank you God and family for a wonderful two weeks of vacation!

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Twelve

We are now officially home but the vacation is not yet officially over, the best and most fun is yet to come. I have been forbidden from going out to the church building until Saturday because tomorrow I get to finish the front flower beds which I began weeks ago. This is probably best as there has been a growing possibility that a neighborhood lynch mob is going to hit if something is not done. Maybe I will buy some time with the flower beds till I can try to get some grass planted this fall when it is cool enough. The really exciting thing about working outside in the garden tomorrow is that Gary England, local weatherman legend, said it is going to be 102 degrees with a heat index of 105 degrees, I guess I get to consider the joy of humidity on top of that. Where is my 70's at the beach of a week ago?

Caleb and Grace, and Slinky, stayed in Tulsa with Grammy and Papa since we are heading to children's camp on Sunday following church with Lily and Isaiah. Uncle Steven and Aunt Karen have promised them some time at the lake with the boat and Grammy and Papa have the ever present pool and food (without consideration of Jillian and her endocrinologist). Hannah decided to come home and stay with Grandma and Papa because she didn't want to miss anymore golf or cross country. Cool, cross country is at 6:45am in the morning! That beach is seeming to be further with every passing moment.

We went and vacuumed the sand out of Papa's car before returning it and visited with them and cousin Maggie for awhile. Then we went to the P.O. Box to find how many bills are due... due yesterday. Then to the store where Jillian and her endocrinologist were the main factor in everything we were allowed to purchase and ultimately consume. Not sure that eating that sand sounds so bad right now.

We have never taken our family on a vacation such as we did these past two weeks. We have been privileged to go on one trips with family including with my in-laws to Walt Disney World and then last summer my folks took us all to the beach at Galveston, both time they were wonderful experiences. However, this is the first time we have ever been gone this long or have just been with our immediate family. It was nice to see that we survived and had a good time. We said a prayer of thanks to God for permitting us to have such a neat time with the kids.

Now, I need to check the bank account to see if we are going to need to move in with some of the aforementioned family members for...ever.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Eleven

Up at eleven, substituted waffles and bacon for the usual frosted flakes because they were cooked and sitting on the counter, saw My Sister's Keeper (good except, of course, for required teen sex scene) with two kids while papa took other three to Night at the Museum and mom and grammy were shopping, watched kids swim, checked bank account, remembered mom and grammy shopping, checked bank account again, thought about fact that I am about to lose my remaining ministry staff, ate and played at Dave and Busters, swimming, looked at flaking feet, missed beach, considered going to bed early......tough life.

I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Ten

Got up early today after a rough night of sleeplessness. One of the kids could not sleep because of a scary movie commercial that had been seen just before bed time....you will see later that my expert parenting was to take children to a scary movie this afternoon. Went back to sleep for a little while and then got up to eat more of the Frosted Flakes that are still in the cupboard. Miraculously, this morning the original box was joined by a second box! It is a carbohydrate and sugar miracle. Confessed to Andrea, after I finished eating, that I just realized I forgot to bring my cholesterol medicine on trip so it has not been taken in some time.....got health and life endurance lecture from Andrea who is still reading her latest health book (thanks Jillian Michaels for giving my life such a new enjoyable twist, I shall think of you in a special way each time I am not allowed to drink out of a plastic bottle or partake of caffeine after lunch, or the many other things that you, and your dear endocrinologist, have taught my dear Andrea). Ate leftovers for lunch which was just fine with me as we had roast and gravy last night. Checked the bank account many times to see if we could still afford gas money for the trip home or food for the remainder of the month.

Thought about the proof I never did receive from the printer for our offering envelopes and considered how many I should have printed. Got a call from the printer that the envelopes had been printed and were ready for pick-up. Decided that I didn't have to worry about the proof or printing quantity anymore.

This afternoon Andrea went to get my glasses which had to go to California for a second time this summer for repair. She sent me, and papa, with all the kids to see Transformers II. Regardless of what all the critics have said, it was a fun action packed movie, an adventure the whole time. In addition to the action, you had all the sex references and foul language that reminded me of the Spielberg movies from the eighties, I was so glad to put those into Isaiah's vocabulary and ideas. Caleb, and even Isaiah, were not really worried about any of that as long as they got to see plenty of Meagan Fox, which they did. She has also been the topic of conversation since the movie, I could be in a great deal of trouble. Caleb is not concerned by her tattoos or language, Isaiah plans on reforming her....I just asked that she not use the "F" word when they have her over for dinner, Caleb assures me that I am not going to hear anything she says.

Came home from movie to rainstorm which meant no swimming which caused a bit of complaining, something that makes a vacation all the more enjoyable. Then, went to eat Mexican food, too much Mexican food. Now sitting by the pool, fighting with mosquitoes while the kids finally get to swim...life is good.

Andrea saw a bumper sticker from our Florida beach, she is now in mourning. My feet are peeling which is causing me to be in mourning.

Have not paid for a meal, or driven a mile on a highway for the last two days......I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Nine

Today I did not get in a vehicle the entire day, I did not go anywhere the entire day. Andrea has told me that I will be going on a walk later tonight but still, it has been a nice break. I slept until 10:30am, and ate Frosted Flakes, something that I am not normally allowed to eat but since they were in the cupboard at my in-laws I felt that it would be an insult to them if I didn't. I sat on the patio while some of the kids swam. I read the paper to find out that the world is still a mess, I read magazines that were on the table to discover that Jen has a new boyfriend, Angelina is pregnant which may save her marriage, I learned that Jon changed and that Kate feels like a failure while both feel that the kids are their priority. I read one of my favorite authors, Donald Miller, and felt affirmed in much of my own journey. I heard from Grace and Andrea that Isaiah had not brushed his teeth in two days, I then heard from Isaiah that he had been brushing with my toothbrush all week because he had not wanted to go out to the car to get his toothbrush. I had slinky sleeping on my belly while I took a nap with one ear open in case there was a swimming pool emergency. I considered defriending some Facebook friends who seem to be using it as a business tool only, as well as others I am still not sure I actually know, I decided that it would be a good future project as it sounded like actual work right now. I took a cell phone call from Jerry's Water asking if they could come out to the church and do maintenance on our well water treatment system. I checked our bank account to see the best way to minimize the rippling effects of vacation. I emailed Jaimie, our children's pastor, about children's camp which begins this Sunday. I checked the church voicemail to discover that the alarm had gone off the night before due the glass breakage, this in spite of the fact that I had the alarm company disconnect the glass breakage sensor twice in the past year due to the 3:00am phone calls....I learned that the police were called which means that Officer Teddy had to make a trip out to the flats. The voice mail also alerted me to a damaged door, a Beth Moore Conference (a thought that exhausts me immediately), a touring music artist, a boat load of fax attempts, and a million other things.....I answered a few messages and then got back into vacation mode before Andrea ever knew that I had violated vacation rules.

I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Eight

This entry will be short as it is 12:20am and we just arrived in Tulsa after driving in from Nashville, TN. We would have been here earlier but we made a stop in Memphis, TN to tour the Civil Rights Museum and see the Lorraine Hotel where Martin King Jr. was shot. It was very interesting and another chilling moment being at the motel and seeing the famous balcony. I remember, as an eight year old, seeing the news and that balcony after the shooting had taken place. I remember my dad pointing it out to me and the significance of it. I am glad that we stopped and glad that our kids saw the museum. It is about the entire struggle for civil rights in America and not just about Martin Luther King. It was all the more interesting as we had just seen the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham and The Hermitage in Nashville.

There was a protester outside the museum complaining about the "gentrification" of either Martin Luther King Jr. or the entire subject of the civil rights struggle. I plan on studying this complaint further as I am not real sure that I have a grasp on what the protester meant....plus I just finished a ten hour drive so my mind is a bit mushy (or more than usual at least).

Andrea and the kids are now laughing loudly, poor Papa who goes to bed before 9:00pm and trying to sleep now, with stories about the trip which are things that I had completely forgotten. Stories about me falling on the snorkeling boat because Andrea was wearing my water shoes after swimming to shore in her dress, and about her getting sicker on the dock because of the fishermen gutting their fish right off the boats.

It reminds me of our first day in the water when I was sure that I had found a severed human head floating past me. I chased after the head with full intentions of picking it up, something that now concerns me, all the while thinking that this was going to make a very interesting post on my blog....a fact that concerns me even more. It turned out to be a baseball style hat carrying the logo for "Paradise Farms (or Ranch)" in Texas on it. I had plans to keep it and wear it as a cool souvenir, Andrea and Grace thought otherwise and threw it away without my knowledge. Although it concerns me that my first thought was the entertainment value, you have to admit it would have been a story of a lifetime.

Our money has run out so the remainder of our vacation will be spent at Grammy and Papa's. I am sure that the irony is not lost on them that our vacation will mean more work for them. But, I am still on vacation, only now it will mean a lot less driving.....cool!

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Seven

We are definitely not at the beach anymore! Arrived in Nashville early afternoon today to find that life is definitely still going on and the crowds are still wherever country music and all-you-can-eat buffets exist. We checked into the hotel where we soon found a totally new version of a bed which is not a single but nowhere near a queen or even a double....on this I will be sleeping with 360 turnaround boy Isaiah....I could be an interesting night. The only consolation is that they are SelectComfort beds which Isaiah has already set on the softest setting which means we are sunk in like a taco so neither of us will be able to move all night....I have a feeling that my back will be locked into the taco position for sometime to come.

This afternoon we toured the Hermitage, Andrew Jackson's plantation home. While in the house I stepped off the carpet and onto the original wood floors. This is a "no-no" according to daughter Hannah who quickly came over and corrected me. The authentically dressed tour guide then chose to go on break since her job was being done better by this twelve year old girl.

Andrew Jackson was a very interesting guy who married a lady who was still married to another man. People made fun of them as a couple since he was tall and skinny and she was short and stout. He was for the little guy unless that little guy was a slave, a native American, or a female. He adopted a son of a relative allowing him to have an heir since he and his wife had no children of his own. He was an interesting guy who worked to keep the Union together, but not quite willing to get the Union to the moral place it needed to be.

Tonight we attended the Grand Ole Opry. It is a something that I thought my kids needed to see at least once and am surprised that they are wanting to go again in the future. None of their favorite county singers were on the bill tonight but they were still entertained. I must admit I am still trying to figure out what I thought of Little Jimmy Dickens singing a serious and very sad song to and with a Raggedy Ann doll. At one point he was holding the doll to his face and singing of how the doll helped his daughter get through the death of his wife and then him to survive the death of his daughter. Tonight being the Fourth of July gave cause for many patriotic songs to be in the program but otherwise I now realize that most country songs are directly or indirectly about sex.

Tomorrow we will decide if we continue the vacation or head to Tulsa to spend a few days with Grammy and Papa. The kids are split on their opinions of what we need to do...I just looked at the bank account and am wondering if we can afford gas to get home.

I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Six

This morning we said a sad goodbye to the beach and headed out after first stopping and adding our final contribution to the Walton Beach tax base by buying souvenirs.

Garmin once again chose to take us on the smallest roads possible through Florida and Alabama to Fulltondale which is just outside Birmingham. We stopped for gas in Brantley, Alabama where gas is 25 cents higher than either of the towns ten miles before or after Brantley. The gas station doubled as a fireworks stand but the monumental attribute of this station, and possibly the town was their unique approach to bathroom facilities. Upon entering the station/fireworks stand you see the prominent sign pointing you to the bathrooms. I was very glad to see this sign as I greatly needed to go to the bathroom following the multiple cokes I had consumed at Boogey's in DeFuniak Springs, Florida. I was less sure about the whole endeavor when I realized that the men's bathroom was actually a urinal posted on the wall in the back hall, there was a partial partition which still permitted everyone up front buying groceries, or fireworks, to clearly see you at work. I debated just how full my bladder was, quickly analyzed the possibility of this town having an actual private bathroom, and then went ahead and put aside all modesty. Also in the hall/bathroom of the gas station/fireworks stand was a doorway with a sign that said "Danger, Do not Open this Door", directly below the sign was another sign that said "If you open this door you are Stupid!". I stood there really wanting to know what was behind this dangerous door but also not wanting the world, who had just watched me go to the bathroom, to know that I was indeed stupid. I chose to retain a bit of dignity and did not open the door, a decision I somewhat regret as I am writing this blog. On the way out of the gas station/fireworks stand there was a canister on the counter that had yet another sign on it that said "Donations for bathroom supplies". I was going to the ask the lady behind the counter exactly what "supplies" the donations went for since I had seen no supplies in the hallway/bathroom, or if the "supplies" include an actual door but when I looked at her I was filled with great fear so I chose to pay for my 25cent higher gasoline and an individual bag of M&Ms...it was the largest bag of individual M&Ms I have ever seen possibly giving Brantley, Alabama yet another claim to fame.

We finally arrived in Fulltondale and checked into our hotel, thanks to Grandma for giving up all your final reward points to pay for hotels in Louisiana and Alabama! In the elevator going up to our third floor room we were joined by Alma from South Carolina who was sharing with her husband that she heard that someone had pooped in the pool. "They really let it rip!" she said. I am not sure what bothered me more, the fact that there may have been poop in the pool or that almost 70 year old Alma from South Carolina said "let it rip".

We then headed to dinner choosing to try to stick with our "local" restaurants theme we have had throughout the trip so we passed Chic-Fil-A and headed to a "world famous" resturant that turned out to be Cajun themed in a building that looked like a former Braums (I realize that they do not have Braums in Alabama....or at least none that we saw). We did not realize until entering that this was a Louisiana Cajun restaurant which had everyone giving looks when the notebook size menus were thrown on the table. The kids chose the authentic Cajun dishes of Pizza, Fries, and Grilled Chicken with a dessert of Ice Cream. Andrea and I had to stick with our "You need to try new things" lectures so I ate probably the one type of food I have never been drawn to.....yes, Jaimie and Andrew, I ate your Louisiana food and I am still alive. I asked the waitress what "Dirty Rice" is, a question I thought was totally appropriate since it was on the menu, and she told me that every morning the cook comes in and puts all the rice on the ground and walks around on it and then puts it in the oven. I ate the Dirty Rice proving to the kids that I will even eat food from a state where the preparation involves putting it on the floor.

As all the Dirty Rice and Shrimp Creole was almost gone from my plate, or at least pushed around so it looked eaten, we began to talk with the waitress and the other customers in the restaurant who all seemed to be related to the waitress. I was asking about attractions we should see in the area and all anyone could think of was the IMAX. Realizing that I was in a Louisiana Cajun restaurant in Alabama I could not help but see how this group of southern white folks felt about the civil rights significance of their area. I asked about 16th Street Baptist Church (where the four girls died in the early sixties after the KKK placed 19 sticks of dynamite under the auditorium) and the Civil Rights Institute and Museum in Birmingham. There was a quick pause and the conversation changed, it was very obvious. "I think there is an art museum down there also," was her response. It was very interesting.

Not sure that we will have time tomorrow before heading to Nashville we went ahead and drove downtown by the church. It was the most ordinary site you could imagine, making it all the more chilling. Our kids got the speech, the kids defined it as a lecture, about labeling people and taking on hate. We talked about Hitler, minorities, gays, etc stressing that the labels can come from anywhere including people that we respect and admire.

When we got back to the hotel we went ahead and took a chance on the possibility of poop in the pool allowing the kids to suit up. I grabbed my new Donald Miller book and Andrea grabbed her latest health book, we may never get to eat anything tasty again. We sat down by the pool while the kids got in.....there was no poop anywhere to be found.

Tomorrow we head to Nashville where we are going to go to the Grand Ole Opry tomorrow night, unsure what is next.....I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Five

Our last full day at the beach, we have fallen in love with Santa Rosa at Walton Beach, Florida. Andrea, the kids, and I have all signed on, hopefully, for a repeat next year.

It was a pretty uneventful day, spent mostly at the beach except for a couple of hours this afternoon when we had to get out of the approaching storm. Made us appreciate what a hurricane must be like. Ate dinner at Amore's and dessert at Lucille's and then back to the beach until dark. Caleb buried Isaiah twice, once giving him a female body complete with anatomically correct, although quite inappropriate, body parts, the second burying was with Isaiah's ideal male body, ripped abs, etc. this also with anatomically correct, still inappropriate, body parts. Isaiah wanted a picture for his face book page, I insisted that the questionable body parts be surgically removed prior to the picture....we have learned much from cousin Drew's facebook picture postings.

After Isaiah dug himself out of the sand he began to tell me of his other life long dreams, in addition to the ideal body. These included going on a cruise, something he has wanted to do his "whole" life, eating the world's largest sloppy joe and then eating the world's smallest sloppy joe (he doesn't like sloppy joes by the way)....then we got sidetracked by a spotting of the worlds largest crab swimming around or feet. By this time I looked up and saw that Caleb had now buried himself and had somehow managed to give himself anatomically correct, yet still inappropriate, body parts....at least we have hope that he will do well in biology this year in high school.

Kids are now in taking showers, it came to our attention that two of the Anthony children, male children to be specific, have not bathed since Louisiana (maybe Oklahoma). Since we are about to sit in a vehicle together for the next couple of days it was decided by the females in our group that they would shower with soap. They protested but were outvoted....their argument that they have been in the ocean and the pool did not carry much weight......my testimony regarding them using the bathroom in the ocean seemed to seal the deal for the girls argument.

Speaking of argument, I have been spending the time this week prior to going to sleep reading the Justification argument going on between theologians N.T. Wright and John Piper. Evidently this argument has been going on for over a year, with both men writing a complete book since it began. Even though I am a year behind I am finding it fascinating, not just that they are on this topic but that this past year this has been the same journey God has taken me on in my time in the Word. I find much of what both men say insightful and interesting and find myself encouraged that this discussion, especially the idea that our lives show fruit if we are truly justified, taking place not just among theologians but pastors and lay people.

Well, the rain is hitting hard again and I need to get off the patio. Tomorrow we head to Birmingham, Alabama where I hope to get to take the kids on a visit helping them better understand the battle for equality that has taken place in this country.

I am on vacation!

Here I Dwell,
Rick

Vacation - Day Four

We got around early this morning, 9:30am (remember, we are on vacation), and headed to Destin to meet the Pelican Adventures boat which was going to take us snorkeling and dolphin watching. We got lost, but after calling Vern, the Pelican Adventures lady, we discovered that we were actually lost in the parking lot of Pelican Adventures....we were now "The Stragglers" according to Vern, I started to share with her my Native American heritage but thought that getting lost may not be a trait of that heritage. Andrea also feels that Earl was wrong and that the only thing Native American about me is that I was birthed in Oklahoma against my will.

We got on the boat after preparing Andrea with a double dose of nausea medicine and after the rules were reviewed which included "Please tip the captain and crew after the boat ride for their hard work". Andrea had chosen not to wear her swimsuit because her fantasy plan for the day included her not getting sick (I brought a plastic bag just in case), the captain gently taking her up to the shore where, upon the gentle arrival, she would have a lounge chair waiting under a palm tree where she would read her latest health book. The captain was only able to get a ways off the shore which involved all of us jumping from the boat with our snorkeling gear and swimming to the best fish viewing location. The captain did not seem to understand the plans of Andrea even when she later shared them with him. After sitting on the boat with the captain, the snack shop lady and the passenger with a infant for about an hour, and after the waves began to shatter the one final part of the fantasy (Andrea will not get sick) she chose to go ashore. The captain still did not feel that he could bring the boat to the shore, nor did he seem to understand the whole palm tree, lounge chair, and book plan, so Andrea jumped off the boat in her sun dress and swam over to us. Once the snorkeling was over and we got back on the boat the captain, still not understanding any part of the fantasy especially the "not get sick" part headed out of the bay to see the dolphins. Two dolphins began swimming in front of the boat which led the captain (still forgetting the fantasy) to chase them up and down over the waves. Andrea had now begun a new fantasy which included as few people as possible being hit by her seasick expression. Once back on the dock, still no seasick expression, Andrea made it to the car, looking worse than any hospital patient I have ever seen, where she vividly expressed her seasickness.

She took more medicine, she emptied her stomach, she took more medicine. She began to not care.

When we arrived back at our condo all five kids were forced to endure a hell greater than any they have endured thus far in their lives....they had to wait, before heading to the beach, for mom and dad to take a nap. Dad had to sleep off the fact that he is almost 100 years old, Mom had to sleep off her mega dose of "I don't care if I am seasick pills".

At 5:30pm we finally headed out. By this time all fantasies had been set aside and the kids were now in complete control. Andrea stayed by the pool with Hannah and Grace, who were tired of the beach, and I headed to the beach with Isaiah, Lily, and Caleb. At about 7:00pm, as the sun was beginning to set, Andrea and the two girls joined us at the beach. We dug giant holes, we buried siblings, we took care of that pesty shell problem the ocean has, we quickly got out of the water when we saw a stingray....I looked up and Andrea was sitting on a straw mat (no palm tree) reading her health book without a hint of sickness. After the sun had set and it began to be dark we headed back to the condo where we got in the pool....I looked up and there was Andrea, sitting on her lounge chair and under a palm tree, reading her health book. Fantasies just take a while.

Later we decided to do a reverse dinner and go for dessert and then return for a sandwich dinner. We walked to the nearby restaurants just as they were shutting down for the night. So, we loaded up the car and ended up at a Karaoke Bar and Grill where we ended up eating dinner and listening to 15 year old Ashley sing "I Do Dirty Things Cheap", and Slim sing "Wild Thing", and Bud and his father-in-law sing "You Don't Have to Call Me Darlin, Darlin." They did not serve dessert, apparently dessert does not go with Karoake, so we ate appetizers and other non dessert items. We finished eating at 10:15pm just as the DJ announced that it was the end of the Jr. Karaoke time, we were not real sure how much more unjunior you could get than "I Do Dirty Things Cheap" so we decided that it was time to head out.

We are now home, I checked our bank account and we can still buy gas for the trip home, the ducks are still loud, and I have no idea of tonight's sleeping plans.....I am on vacation.

Here I Dwell,
Rick